Me At Times Square?

A very dear friend of mine asked me whether I'm going to Times Square for New Years.

Shuh, right. Me with a nillion people? Who are drunk and obnoxious? Pushing and squeezing on me?

In the words of Flo: "Kiss my grits!"

Merry Christmas Readers!

I hope you all had a wonderful time and received some wonderful gifts.

I'm still in Brooklyn and I've typecasted the cast of characters here:

My niece: The center of the universe. A drama queen who eats, sleeps, and cries.
My sister: A good mom, who is totally in love with the center of the universe.
My brother-in-law: Mr. Smarty Pants. Good at computers, Jeopardy, and Bible trivia.
My mom: Old school nurse who thinks pediatrics and newborn practices has not been changed since the 70's.
My dad: Someone I still seek approval from. When I'm around him, I feel like I can't do anything right.
Me: A little bored? A little too lazy? Spoiled rotten by his mom? Broke beyond the ghetto?

(Yes to all the above.)

Have a easy-breezy week at work.

Twins? Separated At Birth By Several Years?

One is Eric Dane from "Grey's Anatomy", the other is Chris Hemsworth pwho played George T. Kirk (James Kirk's dad) from "Star Trek" the movie from this past summer.

Can you guess which is which?

(I'll take either one.)

(cringe)

Late tonight, my parents and I are getting on the NYC Shuttle that takes you directly from Charlottesville, Virginia to New York City. We will spend Christmas there with my sister, brother-in-law, and my niece.

It's a grueling 6+ hour trip in the night aboard a coach bus.

Ugggh. What a way to spend Christmas Eve Eve Eve.

Hey S.A.D.'s- Be Glad

To my readers that suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder (you dance in the spring and summer but cry in the fall and winter);

The worst is nearly over: today is the first day of winter, the shortest day of the year. This means that every day from her on out will get longer until Summer.

To Mommies

I want to know whether this happened to you.

When a woman shifts from being childless to a mother, do they always lose their "mojo"? A couple of women I know were once glamorous, energetic, and took good care of themselve. But when they had children, they transformed. They let themselves go and committed to a life of sweatpants, infrequent bathing, and went into retirement from make-up and haircuts.

I understand that their child (or children) become a top priority for eighteen years or longer, but when do they start focusing on themselves again?

Pardon me if I sound critical and judgemental. But I find it slightly sad when some women lose their sense of self-worth and identity as they exclusively choose "motherhood" and forget about "womanhood".

(Oh boy. I think I just dug my own grave.)

Welcome Home, Paul

I'm not a fan of people in the military going overseas on active duty, nor am I an advocate of people in occupations that requre a lot of time traveling away from their family, but strangely enough, I'm okay with Paul going to Australia for three weeks without me.

Why? First it's only for a short time. Second, the man is a fish out of water here in America. He belongs in one city, and one city only and that's Sydney. Don't ask me to explain why, don't ask him either, because it's something that is much too difficult to put into words.

It's like trying to explain why you're a momma's boy or daddy's little girl.

Have a great time, Paul. Enjoy this well-deserved break from all the hurry scurry of your life here in DC. It'll be here when you get back.

Last week, I went to get my usual bloodwork done. After getting the results, my doctor called me late in the evening to tell me that based on the three of the findings, I have no immunity system to fight a common cold or any other contagious disease. These three numbers were "below critical and now at a dangerous level" and "if I was to catch something, I need to go straight to the ER with a copy of the results." The doctor went on and ask that over the weekend, I place myself on "house arrest and quarantine myself in order that I do not get exposed to a cough, sneeze, or anyone sick."

"It could be a lab error, so go in Monday to have the bloodwork done again."

I hoped he was right. But he called me yesterday. The results were the same. Now he wants me to come in ASAP to receive an emeregency injection of some type of medicine that will rapidly produce white blood cells in my body. He wasn't sure how often I need to get this done.

He didn't have a clue as to why this has happened.

Reaction: Okay. I believe that there are two places I can go to for support: God and loved ones in my life.

God: He is "ominpresent" and "He will never leave nor forsake you." So He is here with me. While I should feel safe and secure because He knows exactly what He's doing, all I do is sit there and bombard Him with questions like "What's the purpose of this?" or "Why is this happening? The doctors don't know, so can you please tell me?"

Loved ones in my life: Without a doubt, they go through it with me. But they go through it differently, sometimes at a different angle. Some of them choose to approach me and the situation from a positive attitude. And while I understand that they are trying to lift me and the situation up, it can make me feel isolated and make me think that they don't understand.

Conclusion: I may sound to you like I'm being negative, but all I'm trying to do is describe the situation from my point of view.

Someone mentioned that I may die not from the multiple brain tumors in my head, but from the problems that have arisen as a result of the brain tumors.

That is definitely a possibility.

Guest Blog Entry From Ocilla

"Hey, what's up? Daddy took me to a dinner party the other night at Auntie Susan's- it was lux! Everything was Christmas- the tablecloth, the china, even the serving platters and the gravy boat. Daddy whould have worn a coat and tie to this swanky soiree.

I had such a great time hanging out with Auntie Susan that I decided to stay over. We thought we'd do girl sleepover activities like braid each other's hair and a pillow fight, but we decided to stay up all night and talk about boys instead."

INSOMNIA.

For the fifth night in a row, I've been awake a oeriod of 2-4 hours in the middle of night for no reason. At this point, I wonder if it's just a bad habit, but it SUCKS.

Years ago, I struggled with insomnia for much longer than this. I think it was three months. I went to GWU Hospital for a sleep study where they detected nothing abnormal. Through it though, I learned all the proper techniques to good sleep hygiene, which I'll discuss later, because I JUST WANT TO FALL ASLEEP NOW.

Let's Make This Blog More Interesting:

Man, I am so exhausted. I haven't slept well for the past three nights. As I layed in bed with a thick and greasy layer of insomnia all over me, I finally decided that my blog was, um, shall we say, a little dull and drab. So without further delay, let's gossip:

_____ and _____, I liked where you lived before. You were at the center of it all, making it easier for me to get around. But I understand why you moved. It's all good. Plus, there's not bumping in the night.

_____, are you sick of me? You seem somewhat aloof nowadays. Maybe you're mad at me. Maybe I'm just feeling a little insecure. If I offended you or you are now bored with me, that's okay. I'll back off.

_____, I wish I could call you! But I'm incognito because I don't want _____ to know. Maybe I will come out.

I am officially _____. My _____ shows it, so that's why _____ is my flavor of the month.

_____, I feel guilty letting you go. It's just that we don't have much chemistry as I do with the others. I'm sorry. It's just that, well, I'm just not that into you.

I feel so scared about the recent _____ ______. It's my number one fear. If this continues, I'm going to have to start all over again.

And finally:

_____, I still have a crush on you. I wish I saved that revealing picture of you. But, oh well, such is life.

I leave it to you to fill in the blanks.

Health Update

Let's report except on the following:

*I've heard people say this to me and I noticed it a little myself: my left eye that was probably going to close up over time has opened up a little! I'm not sure if it's due to me getting great sleep the past 10 nights or whether this is an improvement in the muscle strength that controls the blinking.

*I'm getting these HORRIBLE episodes in my right side nostril where it feels like it's burning like in a fire. When it happens, the only thing I can do is stop what I'm doing, grab it, and start screaming in utter pain. On a level of pain 1-10, "1" being the mildest, I hit a definite "9" at it's peak. The whole episode can last up to two minutes. I'm getting these about three times a day.

*Liver white blood cell counts are still either too high or too low. Doctors can't explain why.

*MRIs and a visit with my neuro-oncologist happen in early January.

*I think I'm putting on weight. I'm definitely feeling softer in the belly. Call it a sympathy stomach for my sister.

To escape the family and the cute Anabelle Skye, my brother-in-law and I flew the coup, had margaritas, and went to Barcade, a hangout with the greatest retro video games in the rear. From Frogger to Q*Bert, I was gleeful like a little girl at Build-A-Bear Workshop.

I played Berzerk, Crystal Castles, and Marble Madness over and over. And staying true to old school losers like myself, it only cost a quarter to play.