I'm Visiting A Family With A Dog And Two Children Under Two.

I learned something:

An adult dog does not equal a puppy.
A puppy does not equal a baby.

North Face At A Cheaper Place

Some people are bargain hunters, always on the prowl for a sale with "take an additional 20% off" all items priced to clear.

That's not me. I am not a bargain hunter. Whenever I hear of a sale, I run away. Outlet malls are not my style, and goods priced to clear are probably out of season, out of style, and definitely picked through. Clearance racks scare me.

But as I looked for a slim-fitting North Face jacket to wear bike-riding, I found one on North Face's website for $229. The exact same jacket was $91 at backcountry.com. Without blinking, I "added it to my cart".

People Magazine Reveals Clay Aiken Is Gay.

DUH.

Hottest Christmas Toy 2008

Well, first there was Tickle Me Elmo, then Sing and Snore Ernie, TMX Elmo and now for 2008, Elmo Live.

He stands up, sits down, crosses his legs, dances, tells jokes and sings all while moving his mouth. He's also very interactive: he will respond when you tickle or squeeze him, and squeezing his nose will make him sneeze!

Better hurry: pre-sales on ebay are floating around $75 for delivery on release date, October 14th. You can pre-order one for yourself on Wal*Mart.

Click here to see him in action. He's pretty impressive.

My Kind Of Town

Sung To The Tune of "Happy Birthday To You"

My birthday, boom-bah,
s'like Christmas, fa-la,
I'm fly'n to Chicago
for deep dish pizza.

"Happy Birthday to me!"

"Heavy" Advice That's Tough To Take

It's not officially "official", but my doctor is ready to recommend/prescribe to me a complete change in lifestyle. In order to deal with my body weight being significantly too low, he is asking me to gain one pound a week for the next twenty weeks, and restrict my workout to only thirty minutes, three times a week, whether it's lifting weights or doing cardio. Start date: immediately.

1 pound of weight= an additional 3,500 calories to typical caloric intake

I guess it can be done, but I'm a cardio junkie who's got to have that daily endorphins rush. Prepare for my self-confidence to slide down the tubes.

Money Flowing Like Water

The movie documentary Flow that is currently out in theaters deals with the fleecing of America regarding water, our consumption of it, and our dependency on it. Readers. you need to know this:

*74% of Americans drink bottled water, and 1 in 5 drink only bottled water

*40% of bottled water comes from the same source of tap water but it is sold back to consumers at hundred times the cost

*If consumers simply trusted the tap water in their own homes, a family of 4 could save hundreds of dollars a month

The movie dropped last Friday and has critics praising and has water drinkers furious. Click on the above link to see where it's playing near you.

One Smooth Dawg.

His name is Bastardino, serving as mascot of Tokidoki, like Julius the monkey for Paul Frank.

He looks like how I feel some days.

Okee Dokee, Tokidoki

Well, the trip to Nueva Djork opened my eyes to something different, something crazy.

I got the messenger bag on the left. Crazy, right? (Trust me, it's not a woman's bag.) But it looks like I threw up a pack of Lifesavers all over it.

It's from a designer called, Tokidoki, who surprisingly is not from Japan or NYC, but from Italy. His designs and characters are like Paul Frank, but with a harder edge and a little darker. Oh one more thing- Tokidoki cannot be purchased from Target and Wal*Mart leaving the designs a little more exclusive, more rock-like.

Nueva Djork

Leaving tomorrow around noon, returning to DC on Sunday...if you want a Folex, a baby turtle, or a Magnolia cupcake, e-mail or call me.

Taking Ms. Drama Diva (Taylor). Should be interesting.

VMA Hangover

It was nearly 25 years ago when MTV had their first Video Music Awards. Can you guess who was the very first to win Best New Artist?

a) Eurythmics
b) Cyndi Lauper
c) A-Ha

Answer: a) the Eurythmics. This year, Best New Artist was Tokyo Hotel, whom I have no idea who they are. That's how out of it I am.

Who was the first ever to win Video Of The Year back in 1984? The Cars with "You Might Think". This year? Britney Spears "Piece Of Me".

Cancer- 1 Ernie- 0

I started a new round of chemo last week. Because of that..

Today was one of those days where my behavior exemplified typical textbook cancer patient on chemo.

I woke up, took the dog out, ate breakfast, and crawled back to bed.

I then woke up around noon, ate lunch, fed Taylor, layed on the couch, and dozed off.

Woke up, folded laundry, ran a couple of errands, and lied back down.

I just had nothing in me, nothing to give, nothing to offer, just a lifeless body going through the motions numb, apathetic, and in slow-motion.

Bike Bling

Since I am giving up driving privileges soon, I decided to ask for a bike for my birthday.

Little did I realize how much the cycling industry has changed and evolved since the last time I was in the market for a bike.

How much would you say the bike pictured above goes for? $500? $750? Try $6,300.

And the helmet? $50? $75? Nope. $230. (And there are others that go for $400.)

$6,300? You can buy a decent used car!

Owners of the "Demo" bike made by Specialized better have really good insurance.

I Need A Glass For My Whine

Sorry for the lack of updates/news. Crazy short week, so let's get down to the nitty-gritty:

!) Paul's back, so babysitter no longer needed. In fact, I never needed a babysitter, because the whole time he was away, my babysitters were the baby-makers.

2) My woes and whinging (not a typo of "whining", it's an actual word pronounced "win-jing") have re-started once again, as I began a new cycle of chemo this week. Once you start feeling better at the end of a cycle, BAM! Time for another one.

3) My eyesight is continuing to deteriorate: I'm getting cross-eyed and seeing double much more frequently. so I probably will give up my driving privileges by the end of the year, maybe even sooner. Very upsetting and extremely life-changing.

Now...let's get back to the trivial and idiotic crap that never has significance, just an occupation of time:

It's officially official: Britney Spears, Ms. Fierce Hot Tranny Mess, will appear at MTV Video Music Awards this Sunday at 9PM. Although Ms. Mess will not be performing, she will open the show.

Huh. Trivial. Idiotic.

In Birthday News...

It was nearly a year ago that British grandmother Betty McAlpine celebrated her 100th birthday by becoming the world's oldest paraglider, though she would have prefered to have done it voluntarily.

(borrowed from Saturday Night Live)