Social Climber

It's been said that women "graduate" through men like their purse brands: first they start with something like Le Sportsac, then they move or "graduate" up to Guess, Dooney & Bourke, Coach, Kate Spade, Fendi, Gucci, Burberry, Ferragamo, Prada, Louis Vuitton, Hermes, and then Chanel.

Now I've been through many watch brands: Swatch, G Shock, Skagen, Swiss Army, and Tag Heuer. I loved and treasured them all, but I never felt "done" until I got a Rolex.

Now I'm on red convertible sports cars: I first had a Miata, then an Alfa Romeo, a Cadillac, now a Mercedes. I'm very thankful for each and every one of them. Do I feel "done"? Almost- I still think it would be fun to drive a Porsche.

Materialistic? No. (Well, maybe a little.) Label 'ho? Absolutely.

(The car pictured is for sale at a dealership in Manassas, Virginia. Ernie, you're pathetic! You haven't even owned the Mercedes for a month and you're already wanting something else?!Dream on silly boy.)