This One's Just For Me

Speaking to that guy on the phone yesterday whose cancer started in his kidney, then his colon, liver, and now his abdomen made me think:

Cancer, sometimes I just wish you would either go ahead and take over or just go away. You lingering around in my body, making me wonder what's next is exhausting. I constantly think about, "How long do I have to live? Do I have just one more year, several, or will I live past seventy?"

I'd have a plan if I knew. A year left: quit working out, travel with Paul, make amends where needed, and treasure each day. Several years: budget my time, do something landmark-like, such as start a cancer support group, and volunteer at church. Past seventy: Go back to work. Start re-building the nest egg, take Taylor to doggie school, help my parent's ministry in the Philippines, and spoil my nephew/niece whenever that time came along.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. "Live like you've got a year left everyday". How can I? I'm so buried under all my healthcare crap and trying to stay warm outside my electric blanket that I barely notice warm weather and the sun shining.

God knows all the answers and he's the one with the plan. Lord, SHARE IT WITH ME!

P.S. If this one's just for me, then why am I putting it in my blog?